Monday, April 30, 2012

Getting it together.

I am real sorry that this blog has totally become about me moving. It's just that it's occupied about 14 of my 16 waking hours for three days straight. But it will be over soon. Actually, things are already shaping up in here because A) I have an awesome friend who spent about 8 hours with me on this today and B) I am not about to live out of boxes. It's just not cool.

Today's my last day of moving martyrdom, I promise. Then I will be getting back to real exercise and real Islamic studies. For real.

The Biggest Loser wins again.

You may have noticed that this post is about 12 hours late. Actually, you probably didn't notice because this blog isn't really a part of your life now, like it is mine. I deeply regret my tardiness anyway, but I have about a million (this time legitimate) excuses. If you are a regular reader, you know that I moved yesterday. My seemingly innocuous little jump from one small apartment to another about 2 miles away started out great but quickly turned into one big, wet, pain in the posterior by the end.

This was me at 11:30 p.m. last night.

If you make it through this whole post without crying, you are stable enough to be my friend.

Saturday, April 28, 2012

On your feet!

Every time I move, I have a new appreciation for mothers, domestic workers, janitors, and basically everyone else who works hard all day long with very little reward. Today was no exception. Though I officially move tomorrow, the real work was done today. Mostly by my sister because she is a go-getter and I was wandering around the apartment taping little baggies of hardware to things so I wouldn't have to search for the right screws when I want to hang curtain rods. My mom was helping too, wiping down the mini-blinds, cleaning a year of gunk off the front of my kitchen cabinets, and generally eradicating my nonsense with about 72 Clorox wipes. I do not care about the environment while I am moving. It's just a fact.

I should get her pharmacist's number. 

There's more writing ahead.

Friday, April 27, 2012

Friday Night Bytes

That's the name of my new computer club. You can join but you gotta bring your own mini-screwdriver (not a drink) and 4 GB of RAM for the donation box. Also, the door password is 1Up4mAri0&1uIgi so you better have it memorized when you get to the keypad made out of a graphing calculator taped to the door.

Just kidding. I don't really know anything about the computers but sometimes a joke wins over reality. My buddy knows a thing or two (She's been C-prompting since before you were BORN, son!) but we usually just trash-talk PCs and try to get as much out of our aging Macbooks as possible since they are darned spendy.

Name the movie reference and get a free Slurpee coupon to use in another state.

The giveaways on my blog are not going to be as good as Pioneer Woman's.

Thursday, April 26, 2012


New Me would definitely win in a gloves-off contest against Old Me. I'm not trying to pretend I've really changed that much in two months, but there are definite differences in my attitude, motivation level for everything, and the number of hours I spend with these people since starting this blog.

Here's a play-by-play of today's fight (read the points with a little "ding" after each for fun):

Old Me: "Could these people drive any slower?"
New Me: "Alhamdulillah."   1

OM: "Let's just mail it with the errors."          
NM: "We can figure this thing out."   1

OM: "Packing is still exercise, right?"            
NM: "It's awesome out. Let's walk."   1

I don't think armpits are awra for men.

As you can see, New Me totally killed. Before you vomit all over your keyboard (NOT recommended) and go looking for the "unsubscribe" button, I want you to know that Old Me isn't totally out of the running and I am not going to become one of those prissy "perfect" people. EVER. For example, Old Me keeps talking New Me into eating the leftover candy bars from our class concession sales because I put $20 into the kitty for change and never took it back. This means I am owed 20 candy bars. Well, 14 now. UPDATE: I just mixed a bag of crushed-up Peanut M&Ms into some peanut butter cookie dough (of course!) so now we're at 13. 13 candy bars left.

Guess what else? You also win today by default because I took some beautiful pictures of the "lake" on my walk. Eye of the tiger!

Moving delusions.

#1. "I don't really have much stuff at all. It will probably fit in less than 10 boxes." Yeah, if you're talking about your baking stuff! Seriously, you say this EVERY time and lo and behold, you're running around three days before the move taking boxes from wherever you can get them and staying up until midnight filling 'em up. One box just says "OIL AND BAGGED SPICES." Really??!

#2. "I'm fine, I don't need any more help. I hired movers." Okaaaay, but who's going to help you cram your seven cutting boards and a rolling pin into a laundry basket full of shower curtains when your family sees your mess and runs in the other direction? Dear mother and sister: I'm sorry.

#3. "This place is pretty clean already. It won't take that long to finish." PLEASE!!!

I guess they're right.

Just stick with me until after the move, ok?

Tuesday, April 24, 2012


Apparently I have lived by a lake for nearly two years without knowing it. I don't mean within a short driving distance. I mean one block away. I feel like I just got Punk'd or something. Of course I didn't have my phone for once in my life so I can't show you a picture. You will just have to believe me. More about this under "Exercise".

Google Maps got my back. 

Stumble along aimlessly through life with me ...

Last week in Roseville.

I keep forgetting that I'm moving, despite all the steps I'm taking to do it. It might be because this is really the first time I've done it almost completely on my own since college. When I was married we moved three times in 6 years. After we divorced, my ex-husband helped me look for apartments and carried my stuff despite how awkward it was explaining to the landlords that he was just along for the showing. After about 6 months of being on my own I lived with a friend for nearly two years. Now I am packing up to move back to a one-bedroom all by myself. Which is good for so many reasons, but still a little weird. My mom and sister are going to come help me out this weekend, but as I sit here and stare at all of my stuff piled in one corner I wonder if I will ever just settle down somewhere for good.

At least Willy's ready to go. Or he's holding a "sit-in" in protest of the move.

The intro to this post was kind of a bummer. Sorry about that. It gets better.

Sunday, April 22, 2012

Out and about.

You have to say the post title with a Canadian accent—'oot and aboot'. Please.

Anyway, I was running around all day, dodging detours of 94E left and right, going from Arabic to a friend's house for dinner and back to St. Paul to get last minute deets on my new place (I have a key now!!). These excursions may or may not have included a trip to the ice cream shop across the street from my new home. I won't say whether or not I got a single scoop [read: gigantic pile] of "Mack Daddy" which is a pralines n' cream base with Oreos mixed in. Dude.

There's no way this ends well.

If anyone is keeping track of the food I mention on this blog compared to the tiny amount of exercise I do, they are probably coming to the conclusion that I'll never get anywhere. But remember folks, I ate like this BEFORE I started moving it for 30 minutes a day so, you know. I mean. Right?

More lame excuses coming up.

Saturday, April 21, 2012


I may have my first "sports injury" even though what I am doing could never be called "sports" and this is an old issue that could be back due to the two days of rain we've been having. See, when I was helping a friend move a year and a half ago, I slipped on a flat cardboard box on the hardwood floor and twisted my leg in a really Gumby way that did NOT please my right knee. I couldn't stand up for about 2 hours and had to use a walker (much like the one pictured below) to get to the car.

24K of Microsoft Paint glory.
Love the WalMart trash bag. Everything's on Google.

More on my bum knee flare-up after the jump ...

Friday, April 20, 2012

Productive Muslim.

I'm moving in a week, for the sixth time in eight years. That means everything I should have done last week hasn't been started yet (see my intro post to this blog project). However, this time I am determined to not totally blow it and end up killing myself on the last two days and starting life in my new home without Internet, which happens every time. So I scheduled the Century Link transfer, booked the movers (College Muscle Movers this time, I'll let you know), and tonight I am spending my Friday evening packing among other things.

This handy chart will help you organize your pre-move clean and become homicidal.

Don't go yet! I also did ISLAM and EXERCISE!

Thursday, April 19, 2012

Getting organized.

The guys were out of the office today, so that means I totally got my clean on. I absolutely love an excuse to spend half the day reorganizing their mess and making everything "right" with our little world. Some would call it a waste of time, but those are the same people who can sit in a 2.5 hour meeting where nothing is accomplished and feel very good about themselves.

It's going to be okay now.

My justification for my OCD-like behavior comes next.

Wednesday, April 18, 2012

Crabby pants.

I don't know how it happened but at about 6:14 p.m. today I got real crabby. I also couldn't seem to think straight, so everything was more difficult than it needed to be, from carrying a box in a way that makes sense to walking in the right direction to my car. I tried to shake it off in several separate attempts but it's still there, underneath my furrowed brow. I am sorry if my crabbiness comes through the Internets and ruins this post for you.

Someone needs a nap.


Three months to go.

Ramadan starts in 92 days (roughly). That's pretty much three months. Maybe you will notice that the start of Ramadan is when the voting on motivation ends on this blog. Things need to be done before then.

These days are officially over.

My pre-Ramadan goals are coming right up.

Monday, April 16, 2012

Learning to love.

Don't get all mushy on me. This isn't about a guy. Well, not exactly. The post title refers to some advice our teacher gave us in class over the weekend which was that you cannot love the Prophet (salli Allahu alayhi wa sallam) unless you learn about his life and get to know him. He's not just any guy though, he's the most beloved of all human beings ever. So I will be pursuing a deeper understanding of his life to feel this true love everyone's always talking about.

I thought about how this could relate to exercise and it dawned on me that I am really starting to like it. I won't go so far as to say I love it yet. I still have my moments of "Do I HAVE to???" every day, but I am finding that the consistency is helping a lot and I don't dread it as much as before.

Sign me up for this class!

More on ways to get your feelings on after the jump.

Sunday, April 15, 2012

Real quick.

I am committed to making this one short. It's been a long and wonderful weekend of class so I want to chill a bit before going back to work tomorrow. To help truncate my usually verbose M.O., I am going to pull a fast one here. I would like to trade some of my Islam Miles® in for some Exercise Points®. I don't know if this is allowed under the Terms and Conditions of this web log, but like my mother I like to push the envelope of "legal" every once in a while just for fun. So since I did 16+ hours of Islam this weekend, I will do no exercise or health tip today. Deal? Good.

I'll give up whatever's back there as long as she never wears that suit again.

To keep things light and easy, I just put some class highlights on the next page.

Saturday, April 14, 2012

From bad to best.

It keeps happening. Whenever I try to do too much in a short amount of time and I think "I got this—it will take me max 10 min to get there" then the freeway's closed but I skip the detour because I think, "I can do better than that dumb road, right?" So there I am, driving around the curves of a lake (which is all the time here in MN) behind some guy in a Buick going 23 mph while listening to AM radio.

Long, painful story short, similar things kept happening this morning and I was way too late to class to set up the tea and goodies (again, extreme irony from yesterday's post duly noted). I hate to be late.

Full disclosure: I stole this from a Pizza Hut® ad.
How did they know the #1 lie told by people in my community?

Some nice people jumped in though and we got everything done. Kind of.

Friday, April 13, 2012

Happy ending.

This has been another kinda rough week for me. I haven't been sleeping much and as a result, the things at work that annoy me slightly have almost sent me into mouthing-off territory, where I don't need to be.

For example today, a man who doesn't work in the office (but let's just say he has significant power over me) commented that I had forgotten to make the tea for everyone. What he meant was, "You are a woman, you make the tea". Which I would actually appreciate more than the backhanded remark he used. And this isn't the first time he's made a comment like that. Now everyone who knows me will tell you that I am normally quite accommodating in this regard and I will even show up early to make tea or go buy treats so people will enjoy themselves. But I do it because I like to, not because I'm told to. It's  not even my job at all.

Anywho, I somehow strangled my exhaustion-fueled rage into low-grade contrition and said "I didn't forget to do anything." which is about 16 times better than what I wanted to say (or scream). We won't type that here.

Oh no he didn't.

Thank God the evening was so much better than the day.

Thursday, April 12, 2012

Don't judge.

I can be really judgmental. Like right now, I am looking down my nose at for saying it's either "judgmental" or "judgemental" which I know they did just to please the people who kept complaining that the correct version just didn't "look right". Those pushovers!

But part of my self-improvement will come from tackling these faults in addition to my health issues and lack of Islamic knowledge. So I gotta try to work on this.

Even Judge Reinhold knows there are two sides to every story.

Click "read more" to read more.

One day at a time.

I'm not in AA or anything, I just felt compelled to remind myself (and by extension, you) that it can be easy to overdo it sometimes when embarking on something new. This can lead to some not-so-awesome results. So far I haven't gone too crazy with this blogging thing even though I haven't missed a day yet. But that doesn't mean I need to go and put myself in traction trying new things. The exercise portion of this post will explain. So to everyone who may be thinking "If SHE can do it, I can too!" then you're right, but you might also not be able to do what I can't do. So take it easy, ok?

Sometimes the very first search result is the best.

Keep going to see my mom shout-out.

Tuesday, April 10, 2012

Making time.

I'm guilty of saying I'm too busy all of the time. In fact, my life has been significantly simplified in the past couple of years. I have one job, I barely volunteer, and most people I don't know have managed to forget my cell phone number after it got leaked in the Muslim community. It's almost a little lonely!

Before you start suggesting projects I could be a part of, know that I am much healthier now as a result of my downsizing. Gone are the crying-stressball-rage-outs at work, the 3 a.m. press release editing sessions, and mixing and matching my employers all day, depending on the situation.

It's not quite like this at my place.
I don't like the feeling of anklet socks at all.
I now have time to do all kinds of things like read, visit friends, and write this blog, alhamdulillah! Speaking of which ...

Monday, April 9, 2012

On point!

I don't like to brag (who am I kidding, we all like to brag, we just say we don't) but I am particularly proud of my accomplishments tonight considering the kind of day I had. I won't get into that.

I will keep this post brief because I want to relish in all of my free time but I will say that even though I worked until 6:15, I still managed to do some cleaning at home, exercise and take care of the "Islam" 20 minutes, cook dinner, eat, and bake a fantastic (and traditionally complicated) surprise for someone all before 9:00.

YES!! Alhamdulillah.

Willy doesn't really care about my productivity so I hope you do!
The rest of this will be light and easy, I pinkie swear.

Sunday, April 8, 2012

Non-Muslim Holiday Amnesia

I have NMHA, a common condition that causes me to be oblivious to holidays other than the 'Eid Days, which are the only holidays allowed for Muslims. Once you contract this disease, there is no treatment or cure. You just have to live with it. Today, I kept forgetting that it was Easter. When texting a friend about shopping, she was saying that a lot of stores were closed. I was like, no, I always buy clothes today because they have big sales. Then I realized that's Labor Day. In September. Oops.

This handy chart shows the causes of amnesia. I wish I had made it.
More of my symptoms on the following page ...

Down the lizard hole.

More about the lizard in the Islam section. For now, an apology. I have been VERY remiss in my Health Tip of the Day posting, which I hadn't realized until about 12 seconds ago and I regret it considerably. I am sorry.

I love saying "Rats!" when I goof up. Also, letterpress is awesome.
Click for link to Etsy shop (not mine) for more of these sorry cards.

In an effort to make up for the lapse and so I won't get too worried about letting you down, I will add some extra tips today and make a 5-item de-stressing list for us all after the jump. 

Friday, April 6, 2012


Today was pretty rough. I won't lie and say I had absolutely no time for real exercise or Islamic studies but I will say for the first time since I started this project, I had no energy for either and couldn't talk myself into it. However in the interest of never-not-posting (huh?) here's a kinda sorta recap so I don't get in trouble with the authorities, whoever they are.

It's not like this lady is gonna ticket me for shoddy blogging or anything.

Thursday, April 5, 2012

Timing is everything.

Things seem to have a way of working themselves out. Many times today, stuff just seemed to fall into place and I feel like I not only got a ton of work done, but some great advice came in at a perfect time, just when I needed it. This is how Allah works. It's amazing.

Speaking of timing, here's my 30-minute meal using the salmon I bought at Menard's.
Salmon cakes, roasted taters and 'spare-gus. I told you I would send a picture!
Read on for a little exercise and a lot of Islam today.

Nice Ride!

Today was excellent. Just good stuff all around.

First, congratulations are in order for my hadith study buddy, intern, and friend who learned to parallel park today using RubySue, my soon-to-be-former car. We don't need no stinkin' traffic cones! There's always some junk in my car to use instead. Yes, Uban, that's your Bundt pan holding up the ice scraper on the left.

She got it on the 3rd try. Probably a world record!

Join me on the next page for some more good vibes...

Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Gal Pals and Bromance

It was a really busy and stressful day at work. I won't bore you with the details. Let's just say I had to pack a lot of stuff into about 6.5 hours during which I barely stood up from my chair.

I designed a t-shirt today, but it wasn't this one.
There is supposed to be a jump here...

Monday, April 2, 2012


Since I am sore/tired/lazy these past few days and I stayed WAY too late at a friend's house eating tater tot hotdish (yum!) and baklava (double-yum!) while we caught up on nonsense, I decided to combine my disciplines today and combine the exercise with the Islam.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with this.

Sunday, April 1, 2012

I'm sore!

I know, I'm such a whiner, right? But it's true. Yesterday caught up to me and I had a long but fun day baking with the ladies and now I regret my "tired" proclamation from yesterday.